Drop a line (or a whine) about today’s zoomies, 3 a.m. parkour sessions, and the exact second the royal food bowl was half-empty. Think of it as your cat’s gossip column—written by you, the loyal servant, so future-you can look back and wonder how such a tiny creature took over the lease. Date it, rate it, attach the blurry tail-photo. If the entry ends with “send help (and treats),” you’re doing it right.